Sometimes we all reach a point where we just don’t feel like we have it all together anymore. I mean, we get inklings along the way that we’re just keeping everything together but we put those hints aside in order to keep on going. And then we reach that point. The point where something has to change or we will fall apart.
My husband and I reached that point, individually and as a family, this week. I’m exhausted from it. But in the end it was worth it, because the changes we made in order to not fall apart are exciting, scary and rejuvenating.
As a couple we’ve always valued ambition. Not in a “trample on anyone and everyone who gets in your way” kind of way, more like we believe that hard work is rewarded and that we should work hard to provide a good life for our family. And working hard is exactly what we’ve done.
Before having my son I worked full time shift work in a high stress environment, which affected my health and my fertility. After having my son and having time away from that environment I could see how unhealthy it was and swore I would find a different way. Three years on and I’m still working on it. I’ve re-discovered my purpose and am building a beautiful business for myself.
There has been one big obstacle in the way however. My husband was still working crazy hours in a high stress environment, focusing on the money this brought in to support our family. He is an amazing provider and a wonderful father. But, he was absent. We were both stretched thin with him fitting in work, sleep and work and me managing a business and running a household. Our son would cry because he missed his daddy.
This week it all came to a head. My husband unintentionally let me down because he was too tired to follow through on a promise. And I cried, for hours. And I told him I was done. I was done with feeling like a single parent. I was done with having a zombie as a husband and I just wanted my husband back. We were both hurting and it seemed like an impossible situation.
The next morning however I woke to a phone call from my husband saying that he quit his job. I cried again. This time out of happiness. It’s a crazy move but it’s one that allows us to change our priorities. We can refocus on well being, connection and happiness and allow income to be just one indicator of ambition.
Because in the end ambition is only useful if it results in a positive outcome.
It’s going to be a crazy ride. One that at times will feel uncertain. But one that is worth it. And I get to share our progress with you all.
About Rach Wheatley, Project: Breathe
Rach Wheatley is a proud mum and wife who juggles day care drop offs, collecting pretty things and getting sweaty via a range of fun/crazy fitness adventures. Rach loves working with women who want to live a more meaning life and thrives on helping women live out their life purpose by developing the business of their dreams. She does this through her business Project: Breathe. Her online business and blog provides consultation, workshops and tools to help women build a meaningful business and life.